If I Could Rule The World
Sep. 3rd, 2012 09:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
muchtooarrogantAWOS Random Writing Challenge
This past Saturday morning, my wife, Lizbeth, and I were luxuriating in bed, enjoying a slow start to our weekend. She was using her phone to look at something on Facebook, whereas I was contemplating the feasibility of getting up, retrieving my laptop, and checking out the goings on in LJ land. Then, the noises started.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
"I wonder what the Hell that is?" I asked, looking towards our bedroom window.
"Estelle said she was going to have someone work on the privacy fence," Lizbeth answered, referring to our next door neighbor.
I scoffed. "That's not hammering, the pops are too spaced out." Bang! "Unless you think he's completely driving in each nail with one hit." Bang!
"So," Bang! "what do you think it is?"
"It sounds like" Bang! Bang! "fireworks."
I know, the idea of setting off fireworks on the Saturday morning of Labor Day weekend sounds pretty lame, but trust me, in our neighborhood, people don't need much of a reason.
"I dunno," mused Lizbeth, Bang! "that doesn't sound much like fireworks either."
As with so many modern arguments, the answer, when it was finally discovered, came from Facebook.
"Oh," exclaimed Lizbeth a few minutes later, Bang! Bang! Bang! "I found out what it is!"
"What?" I asked.
"City announcement," she read from her phone, "this Saturday is the start of dove hunting season. Please do not be alarmed if you hear gun shots in your area."
"Oh!" I exclaimed in disgust.
If I could rule the world, the doves would be able to shoot back!
Dan
This past Saturday morning, my wife, Lizbeth, and I were luxuriating in bed, enjoying a slow start to our weekend. She was using her phone to look at something on Facebook, whereas I was contemplating the feasibility of getting up, retrieving my laptop, and checking out the goings on in LJ land. Then, the noises started.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
"I wonder what the Hell that is?" I asked, looking towards our bedroom window.
"Estelle said she was going to have someone work on the privacy fence," Lizbeth answered, referring to our next door neighbor.
I scoffed. "That's not hammering, the pops are too spaced out." Bang! "Unless you think he's completely driving in each nail with one hit." Bang!
"So," Bang! "what do you think it is?"
"It sounds like" Bang! Bang! "fireworks."
I know, the idea of setting off fireworks on the Saturday morning of Labor Day weekend sounds pretty lame, but trust me, in our neighborhood, people don't need much of a reason.
"I dunno," mused Lizbeth, Bang! "that doesn't sound much like fireworks either."
As with so many modern arguments, the answer, when it was finally discovered, came from Facebook.
"Oh," exclaimed Lizbeth a few minutes later, Bang! Bang! Bang! "I found out what it is!"
"What?" I asked.
"City announcement," she read from her phone, "this Saturday is the start of dove hunting season. Please do not be alarmed if you hear gun shots in your area."
"Oh!" I exclaimed in disgust.
If I could rule the world, the doves would be able to shoot back!
Dan
