It was actually just one thing; there was something about the transition between the third-from-the-end paragraph and the second-from-the-end paragraph that was bothering me. But re-reading it another time, I can't figure out what it was; so apparently it was just me? I did read it more than once, but it's entirely possible that I read it wrong all three or four times.
I didn't notice anything else... this is very good. (Actually, that's why I'm taking so long to reply; I keep re-reading it! And I'm normally not a fan of romance.)
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2012-02-13 10:48 am (UTC)It was actually just one thing; there was something about the transition between the third-from-the-end paragraph and the second-from-the-end paragraph that was bothering me. But re-reading it another time, I can't figure out what it was; so apparently it was just me? I did read it more than once, but it's entirely possible that I read it wrong all three or four times.
I didn't notice anything else... this is very good. (Actually, that's why I'm taking so long to reply; I keep re-reading it! And I'm normally not a fan of romance.)
Jem